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We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.". "Sometimes I think you have to march right in and demand your rights, even if you don't know what your rights are, or who the person is you're talking to. Then on the way out, slam the door.". "I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate.


Jack Handey Quote I hope life isn't a big joke, because I

Best Jack Handey Quotes. "If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone." - Jack Handey


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If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone. Jack Handey (born 25 February 1949) is an American humorist. He is most famous for his Deep Thoughts, a large corpus of surrealistic one-liner jokes. Deep Thoughts were first seen in small comedy magazine Army Man Comics edited by George Meyer and.


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Famous Jack Handey Quotes. Here are some famous American Jack Handey quotes, including Jack Handey quotes on writing. 1. "I hope life isn't a big joke, because I don't get it" - Jack Handey. 2. "I think the monkeys at the zoo should have to wear sunglasses so they can't hypnotize you." - Jack Handey. 3.


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4 quotes from Jack Handey: 'If you're in a war, instead of throwing a hand grenade at the enemy, throw one of those small pumpkins. Maybe it'll make everyone think how stupid war is, and while they are thinking, you can throw a real grenade at them.', 'It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man.', and 'Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine, which I.


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Thanks, Jack Handey, for these timeless love quotes of comedy gold.. 1. "Love is not something that you can put chains on and throw into a lake. That's called Houdini. Love is liking someone a lot."


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9 quotes from Jack Handy: 'Before you criticize someone, walk a mile in their shoes. That way, you'll be a mile from them, and you'll have their shoes', 'If trees could scream, would we be so cavalier about cutting them down? We might, if they screamed all the time, for no good reason.', and 'If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten.


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A Little Background on Deep Thoughts. Saturday Night Live used to include these very short bits in between their comedy sketches.Originally, the Deep Thoughts bits featured the voice of Phil Hartman (RIP) in the introduction, then Jack Handey, REAL GUY, would read the surprising, iconic, and always hilarious statements. Relaxing music played over pastoral scenes, increasing the feeling that.


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Jack Handey. When you go to a party at somebody's house, don't automatically assume that the drinks are free. Ask, and ask often. Jack Handey. When the age of the Vikings came to a close, they must have sensed it. Probably, they gathered together one evening, slapped each other on the back and said, 'Hey, good job.'.


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10 Sourced Quotes. If you ever drop your keys into a river of molten lava, let 'em go, because man, they're gone. Jack Handey. To me clowns aren't funny. In fact, they're kind of scary. I've wondered where this started and I think it goes back to the time I went to the circus and a clown killed my dad. Jack Handey.


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Jack Handey. Jack Handey (born February 25, 1949) is an American humorist. He is best known for his "Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey", a large body of surrealistic one-liner jokes, as well as his "Fuzzy Memories" and "My Big Thick Novel" shorts, and for his deadpan delivery. [1] Although many assume otherwise, [2] [3] Handey is a real person, not.


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If you are a really big fan of comedy then you always know about the funny writer Jack Handey who was born on February 25, 1949, in San Antonio, Texas, and start his career as a writer and performer on the sketch comedy show "Saturday Night Live".As a comedian, he also was a famous writer who wrote the famous Deep Thoughts segments that he put into a book, Deep Thoughts.


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Jack Handey Quotes. I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world because they'd never expect it. "Deep Thoughts" by Jack Handey, Berkley Publishing Group, 1992. Discover Jack Handey famous and rare quotes. Share funny quotes by Jack Handey and quotations about cars and waiting.


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Jack Handey Quote. Maybe in order to understand mankind, we have to look at the word itself. Basically, it's made up of two separate words — "mank" and "ind." What do these words mean? It's a mystery, and that's why so is mankind. Jack Handey. Deeper Thoughts: All New, All Crispy (1993) Jack Handey quote: Maybe in order to understand mankind.


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Jack Handey > Quotes > Quotable Quote . Quotes are added by the Goodreads community and are not verified by Goodreads. "It takes a big man to cry, but it takes a bigger man to laugh at that man." ― Jack Handy tags: deep-thoughts, jack-handy. Read more quotes from Jack.


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Home; Daily Deep Thought; Escape From Hawaii; Bookstore; Untrue Stories of Fiction; Humor Piece; 3×5 Cards; Fuzzy Memories; Squeaky Poems; Is There a Real Jack Handey?

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